#mister stinker

[brot-dae]

Spring sproing

[misteromalley]

mister o'malley is so cute, it makes me smile every time i see a picture of him. thank you for sharing your little stinker with the world, i hope the two of you are having a good day :>

you're too sweet! i'm so happy my little stinker makes other people happy too!

[ghostchems]

Can I have the #4 prompt with terzo please? :)

“no panties?” with mister troublemaker

You can’t believe you’re doing this right now. It has been a long time since you’ve really let loose while being out on the town. What started off as a girl’s night has now shifted to a man’s tongue being shoved down your throat while the two of you wait for an Uber.

It started with exchanging small glances across the bar. You clocked him immediately, the sound of his voice pulling your concentration away from the conversation with your friends the second he walked into the bar. He was dressed well, his smile lighting up his face, his black hair falling perfectly on his head and the curious white eye that drew your attention.

He bought you a drink and now, here you are, on the sidewalk with your fingers curled into his jacket, tugging him close to you. You feel him smirk against your lips, his thumbs brushing your cheeks as he pulls away from you.

“Bella, bella.” Terzo practically sings and he wraps both of his arms around you, pulling you against his chest. “Dov'è the Uber, cara? It should be here by now, no?” He is getting antsy, swaying the both of you side to side as you fumble to check your phone. Still, he is pretty much giggling into your ear.

What you’ve learned about Terzo in the short time that you’ve known him is that he is an extremely fun and affectionate man. He isn’t shy but he isn’t disrespectful.

“Ah, here it is!” You gesture to the car that is pulling up and he releases you from his arms, quickly skittering over to the car to open the back door for you. A true gentleman. You get into the car and slide all the way to the end of the seat with Terzo right behind you, settling in the middle seat. The two of you exchange a few pleasantries with the driver and then you are off to your apartment.

You usually find the ride back to be awkward but Terzo is chatting you up and being generally pleasant. That is, until his hand rests on your thigh. As he rambles on about whatever, it creeps further up your dress causing you to suck in a breath and shoot him a look. He only grins at you then brings his fingers even higher and brushes them over your cunt.

Terzo leans into you, his breath hot in your ear. “No panties?” He barely whispers, dragging his fingers over your folds to coat them in your slick. You suck in a breath as he pushes one inside you.

“I thought the drinks were very good there, no?”

“Mm, yes. Not too strong but not too watered down.” You answer quickly, your eyes darting to his face as his smile only widens. He slips another finger in and curls the two of them against that sensitive bud. Before you’re able to make a sound, he’s kissing you and you sigh in relief. At least now you’re able to make sounds. You gasp and moan against his lips, trying to keep them tame.

He breaks the kiss as he slides another finger in and quickens the pace, though he tries to make sure it’s not too loud. Your body is tensing and untensing, you place a hand over your mouth to try and muffle your sighs. Terzo is loving every second of seeing you try to keep yourself composed, licking his lips as he watches.

You can’t hold it back anymore, reaching peak as you groan loudly from behind your hand.

“Cara, are you alright?” Terzo is quick to remove his fingers from you, concerned look on his face.

“It’s a… a leg cramp.” You groan again and lean down, pretending to touch at one of your calves.

“Which one, cara? Do you want me to massage it for you?”

Oh, he is a stinker.

“N-no, it should pass soon.” You sit back up and sigh, shooting Terzo an angry look. Once the Uber pulls up to your apartment complex, you cannot get out of the car quick enough.

“Thank you, sir. Buona notte.” Terzo says before closing the car door and skipping to meet you on the sidewalk. As soon as the car drives away, the two of you are laughing hysterically and Terzo has his arms around you.

“I promise to give you many more, eh, leg cramps this evening, cara.”

[dirtyoldmanhole]

one of my all time favorite fanfic tropes is when the girl romantically gets the stern slash hardass af teacher/authority/mentor figure listen i've always had a horrible weakness for this type of ship and when her peers find out that they're an Item™.

b/c then there's endless comedy gold between:

the peers going: him????? mister evil bastard that haunts our sleep??? you're snogging HIM???????? [does not compute]

even worse when they try to mentally picture said snogging and prolly outright gag

even cuter if they very gingerly try to be supportive but you can tell it's soooooo hardddddd to shake that instinctive very healthy fear :D

even WORSE if they walk in on a private cute/steamy moment lol

the absolute contrast with said authority figure having both the ~drill sgt side~ still (and having a lot of fun tormenting her peers) vs the softer side in bed :3

like there's almost an in-joke of it with the two lovebirds? she now gets to see that there's always been protectiveness behind the hardass exterior but while half of the causticness is very real, half of it is slightly an act because he's having fun being an old sadist and she ain't ever gonna change that lol

(the best ships is when she doesn't want to change him. just give them both a little odd unexpected happiness.)

bonus points if she too starts taking on some of his mannerisms as a joke sometimes just to mess with her peers when they're being stinkers to somebody and it works absurdly well ~

her finding unorthodox ways of flirting with him while being mindful of appearances. (eg still using the same titles but there's a world of a different tone to them ~)

[telekinetic]

tagged by @aspoopalypse :3!

last movie: scary movie 1

i had never seen this movie until a few days ago and i see why they made like 30 of them its so fucking stupid stoner movie

last song: delusionalism by masudore

i like it :3

currently reading: uhhhh kinda torn by 8 books rn but probably most prominent is "The Disappearing Spoon" by Sam Kean and im about to start "Superheavy" by Kit Chapman

currently watching: For All Mankind

god damn the last 2 seasons have been kinda stinker, its always been a libby show but ive been able to enjoy it

currently consuming: pepsi...

currently craving: digeornios rising crust

the crust kind goes crazy on this frozen za

ill tag @fagitzel @mister-moonshine and @skiddesposts

[girlfromthecrypt]

Big sister, little brother (WIP snippet)

Remmy was sitting on the living room sofa, the old TV blasting the midday cartoons. My little brother looked perfectly content, skillfully balancing a plate with a slice of pie on his knee. Crumbs and streaks of chocolate were smeared all over his cheeks, and even his teeth were stained brown as he shot me a wide smile. He patted the empty seat beside him. I grinned and settled in beside him, directing my attention towards the flickering screen while he kept munching away.

"Wipe your mouth, Mister," I told him once he was done. "You pig."

He did so, with his T-shirt, mind. He cackled when I shook my head in frustration. "You staying in town for my birthday party tomorrow, right?"

"Wouldn't miss it." Crap, I'd totally forgotten about that. How old was that little stinker turning again? "You look great for a fifty year-old."

He giggled and smacked me on the shoulder. "I'm turning eleven, you moron."

"No kidding! How the hell do you already have a beard then?" I pointed out the chocolate residue. 

Remmy smacked me again, then leaned back in his seat with a gleeful sigh. "I missed ya."

[1800duckhotline]

Behold him. Ugo. Mister stinker.

[writer59january13]

Many British thermal units* later

Vice linkedin to carnal flesh this writer, (a married heterosexual doofus, – whose alter egos named and highlighted courtesy

Gallant and Goofus) attones to heat these lovely bag of bones

amazingly graceful human specimen more so than required to generate clones,

whose jibber-jabber feeble poetic words

crafted for no particular rhyme nor reason

analogous to babbling drones aging musculoskeletal physique groans

kvetching synonymously nsync with (metronome like) tick tock

where alphanumeric, esoteric, and generic

garden variety alter kocker

(eons ago a foo fighting

beastie boy baby boomer) and/or like

kin himself to famous mummified Pharaoh ala King Tutankhamun's moans wrapped in long strips of linen,

indistinguishable among rolling stones netting sometimes wrapped

each finger and toe individually against many future unknowns

as the soul of mine traveled across cosmos temporarily filling black hole sun, and kerplunked across space/time continuum

easily mistaken for pinteresting soundcloud virtual xylophones providing an x uber rent lyft along the edge of night amidst dark shadows to the outer limits of many twilight zones.

Hence, I will beg, borrow or steal loot and make a fair trade

with a paperback writer,

who exudes profound wisdom

as keen philosophical thinker oh no... no... no, this non smoking bandit, nor drinker will explain to police officer, that me willingly doth plead

guilty as freshly showered stinker

without spectacles yours truly can only blinker

if nabbed he

submissively relinquishes freedom

to do time inside

state of the art clinker, where ample heat warms hoodwinker covering mine rickety musculoskeletal, while escorted to attend requisite appointment with headshrinker with the icy name of Mister Rinker. Token Doubting Thomas here resorted to life of doggone petty crime without fanfare for this common man dirt poor bloke who doth air, (not that anybody

will give a rat's a$$, nor care

a jot regarding me squalid shiftless schlepper bereft of a place to call home

anemic checking and savings accounts with Citizens Bank describes my financial welfare), and similar to Scrooge, (who mutters "bah humbug**" grossly dislikes Xmas time of year, not always the case with yours truly,

cuz as a lad din

Southeastern Montgomery County

one cute as a button little boy with

short cropped strawberry blond hair, (unadulterated, accursed and unbiased opinion), aye declared papa tricked out as Santa Claus

divine and stood bug eyed while shopping with mother and siblings amidst madding crowd (at the King of Prussia Mall) then no living nightmare

not like today November twenty ninth

tooth how sinned twenty four

bajillion people angrily glare with livid rage expect whistleblower shrill shrieking against crass consumerism thru air courtesy bull-let-in aiming crosshair, whereat vendors pushing merchandise hooping he/she can scare

up brisk business, hence

caveat emptor i.e. buyer beware aside from aforementioned hypothetical scenario - I won't ever overspend credit cards, which profligate net spending occurs within glorious land of bilk and money Amazon qua America OnLine, the home of the free..., where distribution of wealth very unfair.

Yukon still experience enjoyment of beauty,

according to this poet of Perkiomen Valley with less sense and sensibility than a baboon, or other naked ape, cuz his pride and prejudice got in the way while seeking love and friendship, nevertheless he can bet

dollars to donuts (with glazed eyes) without oneself spending themselves silly

garnering mountain due of debt

subsequently cue sax and violins gently weeping (think guitar coming

unstrung at every fret),

thus... ya gotta get get aware simple pleasures experience mindfulness, such as zipping across globe on private jet hobnobbing with rich and famous, then swinging by utmost secluded unconventional monastery, and meet...

nun other than one cell bated abbott cost 'ello to thine reverent Mother.

* - The exact origin of the British Thermal Unit (BTU) is unclear, but Thomas Tredgold, a British railroad engineer, is the closest person to being credited with its discovery. Tredgold's definition of the BTU was the quantity of pounds avoirdupois that would raise the temperature of a cubic foot of water by one degree Fahrenheit.

** - The word "humbug" has been used since the 1700s to describe something or someone that is false or deceptive. It's also been used to describe a trick played on unsuspecting people. The word's exact origin is unknown, but some theories include: For example, you might say "Bah humbug!" if someone won't let children play catch on their lawn

[alvdahl]

Mit mobile website stinker

Får du flere kunder eller mister du dem? Hvis du ikke tænker på hvordan dit website tager sig ud på mobile enheder, så kan du støde på en række problemer. Dårlige mobile websites vil påvirke brugeroplevelsen negativt og i sidste ende gå ud over din forretnings resultater. Størstedelen af dit websites besøgende kommer i dag fra deres smartphone. Hvis du forsøger at få et panoramisk overblik ved at kigge gennem et nøglehul, så har du en udfordring. Det samme gælder hvis du forsøger at presse et desktop designet website ned i en lille 6 tommer skærm. Enten bliver dit website for rodet, for langsomt eller for grimt. Hovedbudskabet er simplificering. Jeg benytter selv en enkelt regel, som hjælper mig til at gøre oplevelsen mere simpel. Hver webside skal kun have et formål. Hvad er det for en opgave, brugeren gerne vil løse. Hvordan vil jeg få brugeren til at gøre det, der skal til for at løse sit problem. Har du en regel til at gøre tingene mere simple for dine besøgende?

[cupidppup]

wait is it mister pedophile. post this btw. tell him he's STINKY and I bet he's so fucking SMELLY. I'M TALKING TO YOU STINKER. take a shower mister pedophile - 🦇

IT WASNT REB.. LEAPSKKDKFFK PELASSEE HAHAHAHAHA

[misststewart]

Mister Chew !! It has officially been 1 week and 1 day since adopting you, Chewie. My dad and I are so happy to reunite you with your mama, and we know that Miss Lady is glad to have you back. You keep her busy and keep her company when no one's home. You keep us on our toes as you wreak havoc around the apartment. I love you and hope to make many memories with you, stinker!

[poppetsisters]

I'll admit that Jack Kirby had his stinkers too, but Jack Kirby without Stan Lee still gave us icons like Darkseid, Mister Miracle, and Etrigan. Stan Lee without Jack Kirby gave us... well... The Condor and Stripperella

The really funny thing about POW! Entertainment is that their entire shtick was profiting off of the good will Stan Lee claimed after co-creating the Marvel Universe, except Stan Lee didn't own anything he created at Marvel, and Stan wasn't even the guy who created them in the first place.

So all they were left with was Stan Lee's dusty attic of half-baked ideas and his legacy of being the face of a company they didn't own.

[ghcstcd]

My parrot is making little melodic hoots along to Griftwood...

[pregnantsecondo]

Going to start referring to my cat (Timothy Stoker) as Soft Fuzzy Man.

[thebigpapilio]

If anyone’s doing Adrien August, I’ve got prompts for you!

This is for the prompt month done by @adrienaugust. If any of y’all need ideas, here are some!

Sunshine &/or Shapeshift: Percy Jackson-like AU where Gabriel is actually Helios. He never had children after the death of his son Phaethon until Emilie and Adrien, but his guilt over Phaethon is what causes him to be overprotective of Adrien. If Hawkmoth, he does what he does to revive Phaethon, not Emilie.

Feathers &/or Cat Tendencies: Side effects of being Chat Noir make Adrien chase after birds – feather allergy or not.

Just a Friend: As it turns out, Adrien is crushing on Marinette. He just hides it because he fears his father will overreact and take him out of school should he find out.

Lucky Charm &/or Swap: Ladybug!Adrien AU emphasizing the battle capabilities (or lack thereof) of the bandalore.

Partners &/or Fairytale: Mario AU, with Adrien & Other Half of Ship as the Brothers.

Cardboard, Abandon &/or Helping Hands: Fluffy little tale involving Adrien moving out of Gabriel’s prison mansion. He’s aided by quitting, ex-Mayura Nathalie and Gorilla, possibly his classmates as well.

UwU: Superhero Chat-Fic that turns out to be written by Adrien like Bugs Bunny’s “Ain’t I A Stinker?” moment.

Catastrophe, Nightmares &/or Akumatized: Another Post-HM Reveal fic, but Adrien, who is done, kills him in a way/mood similar to https://archiveofourown.org/works/18319574. 

Childhood, Dadrien &/or Tropical Island: Adrien’s family vacations to a place of choosing through his lifetime.

Cosplay, Modeling, Gaming &/or Tattoo: Adrien goes to a cosplay convention against his father’s wishes/after freedom from Hawkmoth.

Coffee Shop, Career, &/or Puns: Adrien opens a cafe for a living. The name is a pun, of course.

Flirting &/or Fencing: “Battle Dance” of LadyNoir sparring.

Hamsters & Music: Angst fic where Adrien recovers from a panic attack or something with a pet hamster, soft music, and S/O.

Valete,

TheBigPapilio

[hotforharrysheart]

Thought You Were Hungry?

You never did get around to eating the delicious food that you’d stopped at the bougie shop for. Neither one of you could wait to be together and so supper was skipped. You fell asleep tangled up together. Harry woke up first and realized he’s starving. He doesn’t bother putting on any clothes as he meanders to the kitchen and starts pulling sandwich fixings from the pantry and refrigerator.

You wake up a few minutes later and realize that he’s not next to you. You can just hear music from the kitchen. You look at his robe hanging on the hook and then down at your naked body. You find yourself getting used to the idea of walking around naked. Harry makes you feel beautiful and you feel all of the insecurities just sort of fall away. You don’t know how long this newfound confidence will last but it’s here now and you saunter down the stairs to the kitchen. He’s in front of the refrigerator, pulling food out and singing along to Leather & Lace. You come up behind him and rest your hand on his bare ass.

He whips around and grabs you and twirls you around, his eyes taking in your naked form. “Eyes up here, mister.”

“Why? Great tits should be admired.”

You blush.

“Ya hungry?”

You nod and smile as he leans down for a kiss. “Ya wanna start making the sandwiches?”

“Sure.” You move to the counter and start getting the sandwich fixings in order. “You want me to toast the bread?”

He doesn’t answer because he can’t take his eyes off of you. He’s thinking about how good you felt wrapped around him earlier. He’d never done this “friends to lovers” thing before and he can’t believe how amazing it is.

“H?” You turn around to look at him.

“Hmmm?”

You giggle. “You want toasted bread?”

“Sounds great.”

He watches you drop the bread in the toaster and he’s mesmerized. He can’t help himself. He comes up behind you and wraps his arms around you, his hands caressing your soft skin.

“Can't make this sandwich when you’re doing that, H.”

“Doin’ wha’?” He asks, his hands sliding to your breasts.

“Tryin’ to make sandwiches here.”

“Don’ care.” His hands cup your breasts, fingers circling your nipples.

You giggle. “Stop! You’re distracting me. Thought you were hungry.”

“Mmm…I am.” He kisses down your neck. “Very hungry.”

“You're incorrigible.”

“Tha’ another word for sexy?”

You giggle. “No, you goof. More like another word for stinker.”

He smirks.

“You want that fancy cheese you like?”

“Can I eat it off ya tits?”

You shiver. “Fuck's sake, Harry.” You turn around and wrap your arms around his neck.

“Where's my sammich?" He says, grinning.

“You wouldn’t let me finish it!”

“Hmmm…might as well satiate another hunger of mine then.”

“But you just had me.” You say, closing your eyes as his kisses trail down your neck.

“Wan’ more. Can’t get enough of ya, love.”

You moan.

He brushes the sandwich stuff out of the way and lifts you up onto the counter to stand between your legs.

You squeal. “The counter’s cold!” You giggle.

He smirks. “I can tell ya nips are hard.”

You cover your tits.

“Nuh-uh...None of tha’.” He pulls your hands away and leans down to suck at a nipple and pulls back, letting it go with a pop. “Mmmm…Taste good, love.” He breaks off a little bit of cheese to feed you. “Good?"

“Mm-hmmm.”

He presses a soft kiss to your lips and takes a bite of strawberry and runs it over your lips and down your neck, popping it in his mouth. “I'm all sticky.”

“Lemme clean ya up.” His lips and tongue move down your neck. “Mmmm…” His tongue licks your lips.

“I want a strawberry.” You take one, bite it and rub the juices from the berry on his nipple.

His nostrils flare.

You lean in to lick and suck his nipple.

He feeds you a piece of pineapple and rubs it on your nipples and down your stomach. His hand warm on your thigh, fingers spread out as it slowly moves up. He bends his head to take your nipple in his mouth, looking up at you through his lashes.

“Harry Edward, you and your fruits.”

He smirks, dimples on display. He pushes your legs further apart and runs his fingers down your slit. “This is my favorite fruit, ya know.”

You moan. “Kiss me there, H. I'm so wet.”

He moans against your breast. He licks your other nipple, tongue trailing down your stomach.

You roll your hips up.

His lips reach your pussy. “Here?"

"Please..." You moan. “Kiss my clit, H.”

“Ask nicely.”

“Please, kiss my clit.”

“Well, since ya asked…” He runs the tip of his tongue down your clit and back up. He pulls away and you gasp.

He returns for a quick lick and pulls away again.

“Please…”

His finger slowly moves up and down your clit, lightly circling your entrance and then again. “Wha’ d’ya want, baby?"

“Don't stop, please.” You shiver as his tongue replaces his finger, but he’s still just barely touching you. “Harry, please!”

“So needy.” He steps back. “Beg.”

You huff out a breath.

He reaches down and strokes his cock.

Your mouth drops open and you lick your lips.

“Fuck! Please, H!” You grit your teeth.

His finger moves back over your clit again. “Please, wha’?”

“Please, oh please, Harry.”

“Tell me wha’ ya want,” his mouth moves to your ear, “explicitly.”

You whisper, “Harry please suck on my clit. Fuck me with your fingers. Bite my nipples.”

“Shall I finger fuck ya, right here on this kitchen counter?”

“Yes!” You pant out.

“What else?”

“Make me cum with your mouth and then make me cum on your cock. Stroke yourself while you fuck me with your fingers.”

His finger is still lightly moving over your clit and entrance. “Mmm, like this?"

“Yes.”

“Darling, hold ya cunt open while I fuck ya and squeeze myself.”

You slide your hands down to your pussy and hold yourself open. You can't pull your eyes off him stroking himself.

“So pink, ya sore?"

“I don't care. Need you.”

He stops only long enough to pull you by your legs to the edge of the counter and prop your feet up on the edge and goes back to stroking himself. “Jesus, wish I had a picture of ya spread open like this fo’ me.” He brings his middle and ring finger to his mouth and then reaches down and pushes his middle finger inside. “Wan’ more?"

You nod. “Please…”

He slides his ring finger in and places his thumb over your swollen clit.

Your hands falter on your pussy.

“No, hold it open fo’ me.”

“I…I’m trying.”

He curls his fingers and you let out a loud moan. He swirls his hand on the head of his cock and his brows furrow, groaning.

“Don’t cum yet, please.”

“Ok, bu’ ya hafta cum fo’ me. Hurry, love. Hafta cum fo’ me.”

“Harry, I need to use a hand to hold myself up.” You lean back on one hand as he begins to move his fingers faster. You let out a long high pitched moan.

“Singing fo’ me baby, aren’t ya?”

You bite your lip to stifle your moan.

“Don't stop, wanna hear ya. I'll play ya body like an instrument.”

“Ahhhh ahhhh ahhh, right there, right there!”

“Come on...I love to hear ya cum.”

“Fuck…fuck…fuck…���

“Squeezin' my fingers.”

Your head drops back, panting, you yell his name, making his two syllable name into six. Your legs try to close around his hand but he holds one of your legs open. You fall forward limp and he wraps his arms around you to hold you up. “Y'ok love?”

You stay buried in his neck and raise your hand.

He chuckles.

“Just gimme a minute.”

He moves in closer. “Babe, I have a confession,” he tells you, hand pushing your hair back.

“What is it?”

“Umm I'm sorry, but I just came all over the kitchen floor watching ya.”

“Seriously?" You giggle. “Was it that good?”

“My god, when ya cum, it's just…ya look s’free…Your body shakes all over. Then ya back goes stiff. It's incredible how ya body responds to my touch. Bu’ this time…Ya sang out an’ I just couldn't hang on.”

You cover your face. “How embarrassing.”

“Hey, hey, hey…no’ embarrassing! Hottest thing I ever saw. Please don' ever hide from me. Lemme carry ya ta bed an’ I'll come back an’ clean up in here.”

“I can help you...”

“Now it’s my turn ta be embarrassed.”

“What?! Why?”

He smiles, sheepishly. “My cum on the floor isn't exactly something I wan’ ya cleaning up.”

You giggle. “Hey…we’re in this together, right? You with me?”

He touches his forehead to yours, hands on your cheeks "Oh baby…I’m all in.”